If you’re going through a divorce, it’s only common for there to be strong emotions involved in the process. That’s okay – we’re human after all. But when couples allow these emotions to take control, it could end up costing them big in their divorce. It’s always important to discuss actions you plan to make in a divorce with your family law attorney before acting out on them.
Here are 5 actions that could land you in hot water should you decide to “take things out” on your spouse.
1) Finances
Most couples share a joint bank account in each other’s name. This can be convenient but when it comes to a divorce, couples have been known to liquidate the bank account during the process. However, just because you have your name on the account doesn’t mean you can empty it, especially during a divorce. Under Oregon divorce law, most fund transfers are prohibited and placed on a temporary restraining order during court proceedings. By transferring funds out, you could find yourself in contempt of court and legally responsible for returning the money. Plus, it could reduce the overall settlement you obtain in the end. Of course it depends on what you did with the funds, but this is something you definitely want to talk to your lawyer about.
2) Fighting
There is a certain amount of discord that is expected during most divorces, but fighting for the sake of fighting or being right, just makes things worse. If you are having difficulty working out issues with your spouse on your own, then it may be time to hand things over to your attorney until emotions calm down.
3) Disagreements
It’s safe to assume there will be some disagreements with couples when it comes to divorce. But try looking at things from an outside perspective. This is particularly important if you have children. Divorce can be costly and time-consuming. Do you really want to prolong the process over minor disagreements? If you want to avoid court while divorcing, you may need to make difficult sacrifices and potentially attend mediation to smooth out the process. Some jurisdictions require you to attend mediation or engage in some other dispute resolution technique before you are afforded court time.
4) Spying
Family law dictates that Oregon is a no-fault divorce state. What’s this mean for you? It does not matter who was in the wrong, if anyone. You can’t allege any wrongdoing by your spouse. Not only is spying potentially illegal, it serves no benefit to your case. If you have legitimate concerns about something your spouse may be doing or are worried about your children, talk with your family law attorney for guidance on how to proceed.
5) Harassment
While it’s important to be respectful in the courtroom, it’s also critical that you don’t take things out on your spouse outside of the courtroom either. Harassing texts or social media posts can be used against you.
I know how frustrating and upsetting the divorce process can be. But when it comes to acting out, the only person you’re hurting is yourself. By maintaining control of your emotions, you can help speed up your divorce and save money in the long run.